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EndUser

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Scary fucking infographics. [23 Jul 2007|01:14pm]

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[25 Dec 2005|12:23pm]
Me and my buddy Jack wish you sorry lot a Merry Fu-..

..okay, too strongly worded. Season's Greetings, and a Politically Correct New Year!
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[07 Nov 2005|08:12pm]
Agenda for the coming three days:

Monday: Mathematics for AI 1 exam, studyin' for Intro Logic
Tuesday: Intro Logic exam, studyin' for Intro Cognitive Science
Wednesday: Intro Cognitive Science exam

Notice the lack of entries like "feeding," "bathing," or "sleeping."
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I'm alive. [14 Sep 2005|10:24pm]
Alive still, though school seems to be going to great lengths to kill me. Averaging three hours of sleep a night, yet somehow still having a whale of a time, still managing to juggle fairly complex concepts around. I forgot how much fun this was.

Will write more once I've slept proper. Which, the way it looks like, may end up being never.
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[02 Jul 2004|05:01pm]
Yet another stupid personality test GTKY thingy. Sometimes I just can't resist.Collapse )
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[05 Jun 2004|03:03pm]
IdiotA: I just didn't want you to miss it.
IdiotB: Hells I'd want to see it for? If I want entertainment, I just douse some random fuckheads with lighter fluid and stub out my cigarette in their eyeball.
IdiotA: Psh. Immolation played out with the Buddhists, man
IdiotB: Granted, you'll have to use some discretion in selecting your organics. Those Buddhists just sit there stoically and think they're making some kind of point. Bo-ring. Whether they're 'random fuckheads' is debatable, though.
IdiotA: I think they just pissed on the parade for everyone, man. It's just never been the same since.
IdiotB: Psh. Image-obsessed USian. *I'm* having fun.
IdiotA: Yeah, but c'mon now. Can you honestly tell me you've never sighed at some punter as he smoulders and screams, thinking to yourself "If a 60 year old Tibetan can burn quietly, then this is all just show and ego on the part of this self-important prick." It just lacks the depth of genuine suffering. I swear, I'm just going to go back to forcing people to eat their own children.
IdiotB: Hell. Greek MYTH tells us ol' Kronos did it voluntarily and rather enjoyed it, and you sit here and claim precedent somehow makes things less enjoyable? Fuck. Children are *tasty*. How is eating them suffering?
IdiotA: Well, you have to choose your families carefully. Find one of those that actually value the little blighters. Then, you overcook them, and season them poorly.
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Sometimes I feel the need to burn things down and piss on the ashes. [06 May 2004|01:38am]
Largish image..Collapse )
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Sometimes I feel the need to brag. [03 May 2004|10:12pm]
[DM] Wight: [Tell] Did anyone ever tell you that you are one of the truly excellent players on the server?
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[22 Apr 2004|01:56am]
strange things cheer me up;
sunshine, tea, ginger cookies,
a roleplayed murder.
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[29 Mar 2004|03:14pm]
It's not so much a fear of commitment as it is bravery in the face of loneliness, I say.

..right. I'll get back to work now.
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The Death of Klinghoffer [29 Mar 2004|11:43am]
To demonstrate just how incredibly well-adapted to high society I am these days, I threw on some non-ratty clothes the other day, and went to see an opera; no, not the web browser.

I was mildly entertained for a couple of hours.

"The Death of Klinghoffer" is heavy shit, to be brief. Heavy because of the subject material; with the Israeli-Palestine conflict in another upswing, bringing the story of the single casualty of the hijacking of the Achille Lauro is even more controversial than it is on its own virtues already.

As if to pre-empt both sides' critics, the very prologue choir fires off an impressive ideological decapitation strike at anyone who would try to find fault with the writer's bias: after their depiction of the Palestinians' lament for the homes they've been driven from, the entire choir runs to the back off the stage, 'off-stage' but quite visible at the same time, to throw off their outfits; under them are the clothes they'll be wearing for the second part of the prologue, about the Jewish people's scars and memories of war. The message is resoundingly clear; underneath, we're all the same human beings.

Blam. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

The choirs are the high point of the opera, anyway. The entire thing is hit-and-miss; while you can always more or less see the intent behind what happens on stage, sometimes things work, and more often they don't; but when a moment works, chances are the choir is doing it.

As the main example of this: the "Night Chorus," dramatic high point just before the break.

For the last hour or so, there've been up to three video screens floating over the stage, suspended on cables, depicting something appropriate to the scene; birds in flight, flying golf balls, that sort of thing. Overdone and unimpressive, up until this particular scene.

The chorus stands grouped at the back of the stage, and slowly marches towards the front. They're dressed in black, lit by low orange light, and sing about the coming Judgement Day. A single monitor floats above and in front of the group, showing a human hand against a black background; as the chorus advances, the Hand 'calls' people to the front of the main group by pointing down, and after a short while, waves them to newly-forming groups of people, off the main one; large one on the right, much smaller one to the left, advancing in the same slow-motion march. When they reach the front of the stage, the entire chorus has been "divideth sheep from goats," the music ends abruptly, curtain falls.

Time for the break, people. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

After that, the main story seems futile, and insubstantial; some stupid fucks came aboard a cruise ship, scared the living daylights out of the people there, shot one of them under unclear circumstances. Then pitched him overboard, wheelchair and all. Nothing is resolved, nothing achieved; nothing much happens, even. Compared to the visual and emotional precision bombardment by some of the better choirs, the story - of how some fucking cripple was too stupid to keep his mouth shut when around nervous and angry terrorists, who in turn despite lowering themselves to this degree of inhumanity managed to resolve nothing and achieve little more than a temporary victory - it all just sort of.. fades.

And perhaps that's the intent.
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Soliloquy at iconoclast.org, from memory. [26 Mar 2004|02:20pm]
You tell [anonymized], 'apache-ssl config. Mommee! I don't wanna.'
You tell [anonymized], 'It's not that it's hard. It's just that it takes a lot of vi'ing, 'httpsdctl restart's and cursing. And I'm lazy. Tired, actually.'
You tell [anonymized], 'Maudlin, to use a more Shakespearian term. Comes with the lack of sleep and the general annoyance at this fucking stupid world. It'll pass once the $$ BLING BLING $$ starts flowing in, I hope.'
[OOC] EndUser eye-twitches. 'I feel the sudden need to mainline pulped hundred-dollar bills.'

..sometimes I love to hear myself talk. Sorry.
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[23 Mar 2004|09:47am]
I'm awake, I'm awake.. you can stop pounding on my head now.

Oh. Wait.

That's not you, just my headache. Sorry.
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[22 Mar 2004|12:23pm]
My love/hate relationship with FreeBSD is now in full effect. Spent a shivery and sweaty weekend shuttling between bed and PC; when it's bad, it's bloody awful, but when it's good it's better than good. An example of the roller coaster ride I've been on:

*BSD ports collection. Outright dreamy when you're just looking to get the latest, automatically patched version of standard tools and utilities fast, as in now. A single 'make install' and magic happens.

*Then again, it isn't everything. Only offers a CGI version of PHP, for example; I much prefer the Apache module style, for various reasons. Gets more complicated when you want PHP to play nice with the port version of Postgres, which isn't quite the latest, and installs scattered all over /usr/local/bin, var, include - instead of being all in one spot like PHP is expecting. That one took a bit of work; fortunately I've only performed similar installs, oh, fifty times before.

*It's one of the most efficient and secure server operating systems in existence. Firewall built into the operating system, for example.

*Unfortunately, it's not actually compiled into the default kernel. Hunt down the kernel config options, recompile, and pray. Default kernel options are a bit too lean on SysV semaphores and shared memory for Postgres' taste? Hunt down the correct options, recompile, pray. I'm beginning to sense a pattern here..

I haven't even gotten to writing any actual PHP yet.. firewall configuration is HARD and whatnot, to paraphrase the most exalted Lum, and I've yet to figure out a backup plan that'll work with the limited means we've got and prevent us from losing *everything* when the box goes belly up - not unimaginable with me administering it.

Oh, well. Back to work.
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[20 Mar 2004|12:12pm]
Waking entirely too late but still several hours away from having slept a full night, hair one total mess, sticky with sleep and alcohol sweat; the house a battlefield where me, one of my oldest friends, and our plans for the future clashed with ennui, nihilism, and entirely too much Murphy's Red. He left around midnight-ish, and me being the stupidiot that I am, I kept right on drinkin'.

I've just read my previous LJ post, and I vaguely remember committing to the second item at some point, or at least mentally, and discussing it at some length with the people involved. Still loath to touch the logs; I'll probably have made a total ass out of myself again.

Bare feet on the cold floor, what little light filtering through the cloud cover, windows, and curtains isn't helping my hangover any, and the only tea left in the house are a few positively ancient single-serving packets of mango "tea."

No better time to start drinking coffee again.
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[20 Mar 2004|02:38am]
Well gee golly, the very moment I crawl slowly and agonizingly out of this ol' shell of mine, people start assailing me with things I could be doing; hell, I actually feel like doing things again.

Must be spring.

*Partner up with someone I barely know and start a mini web services company. He actually has some skill in the business and design side of things, or claims to; I'm supposed to be a technical wizard of some sort, and have actual experience in the field. I'm seeing little reason not to do this; there's a good chance this bombs, but if I simply sit around doing nothing for much longer, I'll both be wasting time and going even more completely mad. Plus, it's an excuse to pick up more *nix administration experience, and dust off those year-old m4d PHP skillz.

*Join the good people over at aetherealforge.com in a new, fairly nifty web-related project that's mostly under wraps at the moment. On the upside, it's nifty, and confluent with the stuff above in that it'll help me get my code-fu back on. On the down side, it's not going to generate a lot of economic value (read: $$ BLING BLING $$), except maybe in the long term, and it may come into conflicts of interest with the aforementioned business venture re time, money, and head-space.

*Personal projects.. I'd like to write more. Code, games, short stories, don't care. Exercise a bit, mentally and physically. Roleplay my ass off at least a few times. Actually spending some time meeting people in meatspace might be nice, too, come to think of it.

But right now, it's time for another nap.

(edit, morning after: this "nap" thing was a nice sentiment at the time, but you and I know me better than that.)
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[19 Mar 2004|02:27am]
I didn't pay attention for a few minutes, and now I'm more or less officially on my First Business Venture, ever. Even though the risk is absolutely zero, and the work is mostly doing what I do best (slacking and futzing around with computer-related things I only have a very tenuous grasp on) ..I'm nervous as hell. Wasn't planning for my re-integration into society to be quite this big of a step.

For now, I'm spending a lot of time wrestling with FreeBSD. It's not for lightweights, I've found, so I'd better spend some serious time trying not to be one anymore.

Also, having an at least somewhat regular sleep pattern again would be nice.

Good night.
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[16 Mar 2004|12:56am]
So, yeah. That whole 'mad old hermit' schtick? Let's not do that anymore, for now. The required level of alcohol consumption gave me a constant headache, anyway.
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[28 Feb 2004|11:44pm]
Cut your quizzes. Silly lemings, taking up space. Also, an excuse to cut. Cutcutcut, muahaha!Collapse )

Self-loathing?

..this is so not true. Everybody who has spent any time around me knows that my real problem is my my general lack of caring for the world and the feelings of those filthy organics that inhabit it, my selfishness, my laziness, my ceaseless moping on these subjects, and..

Right. Bottle time. Black night, white snow, warm sake, I'd compose a haiku on the spot if I weren't such a lazy and unsophisticated motherfucker.
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[28 Feb 2004|02:08am]
[ mood | intoxicated ]

Oo, the mates got me two bottles of Gekkeikan for my birthday, among other things.

I'm a drinker of the drink-often (as opposed to the drink-much) type, but damn, this stuff is good. Brings back memories of the time I still had money and some degree of self-esteem - funny how I need heavy drinking to remember what I felt just over a year ago, though.

Eh, well. Alcohol and oblivion now. Work on self esteem and achievement and other tedious issues in the morning.. or as soon as the hangover has worn off somewhat.

Now where did I put that "My Slow Descent into Alcoholism" mp3..

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